Entries Tagged as 'ireland'

Reunification

I went to a bit of Swarthmore’s Alumni Weekend. Two-year reunion for me, and five-year for my friends in ’05, many of whom were there. It made me think about (among many other things), my recent trip to Ireland.

“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it,” as Santayana put it. I think it’s quite easy to forget one’s own past, and visiting old friends and old haunts, as I did today and as I did in Ireland, reminds one of things.

In both cases, though, I very much felt like I was intersecting those past experiences from a new angle. Of course, figuratively—I had new experiences and thoughts and such under my belt, and so do the other people involved, and things are always changing. But also literally—in both cases, I interacted with the physical space differently, different spots had meaning. I feel like I should say something about memory and thought being at least partially physically instantiated, but I am not entirely sure I want to go that route. It could be a side effect of the recent high dosage of Swarthmore.

I feel like I’ve become more clear to myself lately. Some people say that self-discovery is not, if you’re doing it right, pleasant. I’m not so sure. What one sees may not always be pleasant, but honesty has, for me, an intense joy. Or perhaps this isn’t self-discovery, but self-understanding. I’m being purposely vague, but ask me about these thoughts if you care. The essence is that one’s past self does things that make more sense seen not just in hindsight, but from the different angles afforded by returning to past sites and people. Reunification. With friends, and, if I want to be pretentious enough, of the self.

tl;dr version: I like my friends. They help me better understand myself.

Ireland

I am here. Flying in, I felt my spirits lighten. It just feels plain better here. I can’t really account for it. I don’t think I want or need to, though.

I got in, a spring in my step despite Ryanair being the awful thing it is, and went straight to the center of town. Just to orient and root myself, I stopped by the old Bank of Ireland headquarters. I absorbed some magic there, and then struck off for Chapelizod. It’s a part of town I’ve not been to before, but it’s lovely. Nestled right between Phoenix Park and the Liffey.

Most importantly though: it’s fantastic to see Brian and Karen. I missed them a lot, and it’s been a lovely evening staying with them. My UCD friends are so dear to me.

Blogging

Blogging is hard. I forget to do it.

So let’s see. Spring is happening—cleaning, enjoying the air, enjoying the light. I’m looking for jobs, but also thinking about how feasible it would be to freelance. The issue is finding enough work, as always. But I think I can do it. If anyone wants web apps or other things developed, hey, I’m game.

And I dance, and I sing. I don’t play enough music. I see friends, and I plan a trip to Ireland in May. That’ll be good. I look forward to seeing friends. I’ve been contemplating the reduction in my wanderlust. I think it’s basically that I don’t want to go anywhere but These Isles, and maybe Canada. I need North. I don’t want to go to these warm places where the air is full of spices. I want to go places where the wind whips over the North Atlantic and the light is clear and silver, and then the sky is filled with slugging grey clouds and the air is filled with drizzle.

And my thoughts, my mental life? Awakening from hibernation. Thinking about what I can do that is useful to the world, and interesting to me. Wondering how making a living fits into that.